A favor please...

My daughter started a blog. Better yet, she's actually updating it, which as you well know is not happening around here. Do me a favor and go check it out and leave her a comment. You know what it's like when you're just starting out...okay, always when you have a blog, comments are everything!

A Picture a Day

I'll be back later to fill you in on what's been happening around here. Bye!

What's Going On & MPM #24

I'm not even sure where to begin...my blog seems to be turning into my 365 Project update and my meal plan. Sorry. The bad news is I'm living in the moment and that's making me really struggle to have any blog time. The good news is, I'm living in the moment. I'm sure most of you have been there. You think my blog's bad, you should see my house! I'm also finding it impossible to find time to clean, do laundry, etc., etc.

So...what's been going on? Well, we're going to the pool...a lot. Jacob and Julianna started swim lessons last week. We're taking the opportunity to stay as much as we can afterward and swim. Okay, full disclosure, Jacob and Julianna swim. I'm a horrible Mommy and sit in my pool chair and read. I hate swimming at a public swimming pool. I hate the cool water, the kids splashing...anyone who admired my Mommying. Sorry. I know I just disillusioned you. Don't lose heart though, believe it or not, I'm getting bored sitting by the pool reading a couple of hours a day (ouch, I know you're throwing things at me right now), so I'll probably be forcing myself to actually get in and play some this week. Probably. Okay, maybe. Who knew? After a weekend off, it's starting to sound pretty good again. :)

We've been playing a lot of Othello and a couple of other board games. Jacob and Julianna are just learning to play and it's been fun to see their strategy skills sharpen.

I've been hanging out a lot with Rebekah. As you can imagine, with September edging ever closer, I'm spending as much time with her as I can.

I'm taking my photography class. I don't feel like the quality of my photos is improving all that much yet, my biggest challenge is finding the time to set up a shot instead of feeling like I just need to snap it as quickly as I can before I lose it. I'm willing to bet most moms know what I'm talking about. Stop and set up a shot? Yeah, I'm sure people do it, but at this point I'm clueless to know how to do it without losing the moment. On the bright side, I'm learning lots and lots about aperture, shutter speed, and ISO. Words that previously made my brain freeze over in complete ignorance.

We've had the opportunity to spend a little bit of time with Jason and Matthew. That's been wonderful. They're moving in a few weeks to an apartment just a couple of miles from us. It will be so nice to have them so close, a luxury we've never enjoyed as long as they've been married. I'm looking forward to that very much.

I had my yearly OB/Gyn and mammogram appointment. In and out very quickly then the next day I started thinking of all the questions I should have asked. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that. Is it normal that even though I'm on the pill my breasts are experiencing monthly hormone changes? For a few days every month they're honestly killing me, yup, would have been nice if I'd thought to ask that when I was there. Oh well, there's always Dr. Google.

Friday night Mark and I got to go out on a date. Very fun! To top it off, through a series of circumstances and some "found money" it was free. We went to Red Robin and then to Date Night. Dinner was fine and the movie was fun. The only downside? We were home by 8:45. We definitely need to work on our dating skills. How in the world did we used to make a dinner and a movie last from 7 until 12? Anyone else have that issue? We thought about going out for dessert or a coffee, but we'd had treats at the theater and couldn't have looked at another bite. It's wonderful to go on a date, but a bit of a bummer to get home before the kids are asleep.

Saturday night was Julianna's dance recital. Absolutely perfect. Well, nearly perfect. It was everything you'd want a recital for a 7 year old to be. She had a lot of fun, did a great job, and had a big grin on her face the entire night. Unfortunately, it was hard for Rebekah. Rebekah danced for years and years, never envisioned quitting really. Then, at the end of 6th grade the growth plate in her hip slipped and she had to have emergency surgery, followed by a long recovery. A few months later they did the other hip. She tried to come back from it, but it was a long year with a lot of restrictions, and she never really made it back. At the end of 7th grade she quit dancing, not really by her choice. It's always hard to feel like something was taken away from you, especially something she loved. At the recital there was a big fuss made over this year's class of seniors, the girls she had danced with, and it was very hard for her. There was a lot of crying, it was a rough night for her, and I was cognizant of how much pain she was in. I was so sad for her. Hopefully, from here on out recitals will be easier, but I knew and understood that last night was difficult for her.

Today was great. My parents have been going through a very time consuming, very emotionally and financially draining household disaster. They were able to sneak away from things at home and come up and visit for a few hours. We had an incredible feast of Mark's choosing, and lots and lots of chatter and fun. I'm always aware what a gift it is to be able to get together and we enjoyed today a lot. It's fun to think that in the future, at least sometimes, Jason, Lori, Lily and Matt will be able to be here too.

Well, that's the news. That's what's going on. A lot of nothing and a lot of wonderful all at the same time. I hope your summer's off to a good start. Here's what we'll be eating around here:

Friday (Date night, ticking off my 76 Days): Potluck for the kids
Saturday Lunch: ??
Saturday dinner (Julianna's recital): Olive Garden
Sunday lunch (Father's Day): Mark picked the menu Burgers, Brats & sauerkraut, watermelon, cowboy beans, potato salad, fixin's, cucumber salad, deviled eggs, German Chocolate Cake--Yeah, I think he hadn't eaten for days when he asked for this menu. :)
Sunday dinner: Banana Splits--again, Mark's day.
Monday: Pioneer Woman BBQ Chicken Pineapple Quesidillas, fruit
Tuesday: Leftovers
Wednesday: Steamy Kitchen's Thai-style Chicken in sweet chili sauce, rice
Thursday (piano): Tricia Yearwood's stuffed peppers, salad, bread
Friday: London Broil, veggie kabobs (I'll omit the tofu)

Check out Organizing Junkie's for more meal plans.

Project 365 #24

June 11, 2010
A trip to the park.

June 12, 2010
Isn't this the coolest thing?
We were taking a drive and saw it in someone's yard.
I wondered all day about the people who live there.

June 13, 2010
We made it to Jeni's Ice Cream.
It was awesome. We'll definitely be back.

June 14, 2010
Cheating.
I did take a picture this day.
Unfortunately, while editing other things for my class, I deleted it. :(
Here's a picture from the day before. It's Rebekah and her private lesson teacher.
Ryan started teaching her at the end of 5th grade. It's been an incredible 7 years.

June 15, 2010
I'm really proud of Jacob. He got rid of 2 large garbage bags worth of stuffed animals.
That's huge for him.
Here's what's left, waiting to be washed.
Lots of work, but hopefully it will help his allergies/asthma.
Yes, you can wash stuffed animals, even ones that say you can't.
Who knew?

June 16, 2010
Dress Rehearsal.
Unfortunately, my shooting in low light situations from far away
still needs a lot of work, but she was awesome!

June 17, 2010
Want to be a rockstar? Well, not really but my kids thought these were very cool.
Take your favorite brownie recipe and bake it in a mini-muffin tin.
18-20 minutes at 350 degrees.
Yummy!

That's our week, I feel like it slipped by, and I hate that. Hopefully this one won't be quite as crazy and I'll be able to take time to enjoy more of the moments.

Hope your summer's going well.

Hosted by Cecilyand Lisa

Hosted by Chris

PSF & Project 365 #23

June 4, 2010
Our elementary school recorded a music video.
The kids had a ball.
Unfortunately, I wasn't able to get great shots of my kids,
but you get the idea. I think the memory of doing this will
stay with them a long, long time.

June 5, 2010
Nephew and Uncle passing the time at Rebekah's graduation party.

June 6, 2010
She did it!
I hope they're always as close as they are now.

My favorite shot of the week.

June 7, 2010
Poetry Jam in Julianna's class. How fun that Rebekah got to go too.

June 8, 2010
I'm taking a photography class.
We've taken a lot of pictures of tennis balls. :)
Hopefully, I'm learning a lot.

June 9, 2010
The last day of school.
Yippee!!!

June 10, 2010
A trip to the zoo to celebrate summertime.

Admittedly not the most inspired week. It's been a little crazy around here with graduation and the end of school. Also, I'm taking a photography class and everything I shoot needs to be shot in manual, which is taking me forever!!! All these are SOOC, definitely no time for editing right now. We have a cool assignment for my class, an alphabet, but it's definitely taking up every minute of my free time. Lots of fun though, and I'm hoping to learn a lot. We'll see...


Hosted by Cecily and Lolli

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MPM #22

I have lost my cooking/meal planning mojo. If it were just me, that would be fine, if it were just me and the kids that might even be all right, let's face it, kids can eat the same few things over and over and be fine with it. My hubby though, deserves better. Let's hope I can suck it up and find it soon. :) My challenge for this week is creating meal plans that sound good (so I'll actually make them when the time comes), are quick and easy to make and clean up (so if we're getting home from the pool or an activity right at dinner time, dinner still happens), and meals that are relatively cheap. Aye! No wonder I'm overwhelmed.

Friday: Southwestern Brown Rice and Black Bean Burgers, fruit
Saturday lunch: Burgers
Saturday dinner (Rebekah's last sax concert): Sweet & Sour Orange Grilled Chicken Wings, rice, pea pods
Sunday lunch: French Toast
Sunday dinner: Grilled Chicken halves, red potatoes, Noble Pig's panzanella
Monday: Beachcomber's Casserole, salad
Tuesday (Julianna dress rehearsal): Grilled Chicken Salads
Wednesday: Lemon Fusili w/Basil Pesto Shrimp, grilled asparagus
Thursday: Grilled Chicken & Pineapple Quesadillas
Friday: Grilled Pizza

Do you know how long it takes to create a meal plan when you're really just not in the mood???

Have a great week! I'm off to work on whittling down my 76 things. Check out more meal plans at Organizing Junkies.

Seventy Six Days...

Seventy six days. At times it will seem way too short; sometimes, I know, it will seem a tad too long. Summer, as defined by the the period lasting from the last day of school to the first day of school next school year, is seventy six days that overall will fly by in the proverbial wink of an eye.

I read on someone's blog the other day (sorry I can't remember whose), that she sometimes reminds herself when things are different than she anticipated that this is the life she wished for. I identified with that so much. This is indeed the life I wished for and I am very lucky to be living it. I'll try not to say that through clenched teeth too often this summer. (kidding) (mostly)

It's going to be a different summer, that's for sure. Rebekah's last summer before she goes to school. I know from experience, and from friend's experience, we have a bit of a ying/yang of a summer ahead of us. Pulling away, pushing away, holding on; lots of conflicting emotions, sometimes mere moments apart. I want to treasure every moment of it.

It's also the very last summer I'll get to have a 9 then 10 and 7 year old.

Hopefully it will be the summer Jason finds a job here, they sell their house, and we get to see a lot more of them.

In honor of summer, and it's wondrous glory, I've come up with a list of 76 things I want to do this summer:

1. go to the library and participate in the summer reading program--Unbeknownst to me, they've discontinued the program for adults, the kids are doing it though.
   
2. visit the main branch of our library system--truly wonderful and just far enough away to be special.
3. say yes more than no
4. read bedtime stories outside
5. go to the farmer's market almost every week
6. relax about what constitutes dinner (cereal anyone?)
   
7. have capri suns and or juice boxes in the downstairs fridge--there for the taking
8. ditto freeze pops
9. make a chalk mural on our sidewalk
10. fingerpaint
    
11. teach Julianna how to ride a bike
12. paint my bedroom, bathroom, the hall, the kitchen or the kid's bath.
    
13. have a lemonade stand
14. bake cookies often
15. workout regularly
    
16. sell bikes we've outgrown
17. go to fireworks
18. take kids to COSI (science museum)
19. take kids to zoo mostly to ride the rides and play on the playground
    
20. take kids to the park
21. take kids to Innis Woods Metropark
    
22. tour the statehouse
23. go to 3 movies
24. go to Wicked!!!!
25. Jacob's birthday party
26. go to Kelley's Island
27. play miniature golf
28. go bowling
    
29. read a lot
30. take a photography class
31. don't sweat the small stuff
32. know that most things really are small stuff
33. celebrate Father's Day with two of my favorite fathers.
34. play board games--Qwirkle or Blokus or Parcheesi or Chinese Checkers
    
35. spend a Sunday afternoon, preferably a rainy afternoon, playing UNO
    
36. go to the pool
37. go to my parents
38. go to the Columbus Zoo
    
39. go to Cincinnati Zoo
40. go to Newport Aquarium
41. go to Slate Run historical farm
42. go to orientation with Rebekah
43. go away for a night with my friends
44. catch fireflies
45. play more Wii
46. make snow cones
47. make popsicles
48. make ice cream sandwiches with my adorable molds that have yet to be used
49. make homemade ice cream...at least twice
50. make an ecosystem
    
51. go on family bike rides
    
52. go for walks by the river
53. go canoeing
54. take lots of pictures
    
55. have dessert for dinner...at least once
56. make bulletin boards for the kid's rooms
57. make Julianna dresses
58. stay up late
59. sleep in sometimes
60. go to a baseball game
61. go on a picnic...or two
62. have Dairy Queen late at night when we really ought to be in bed
63. go to Handels (awesome ice cream with a park to play)
64. go to Young's Dairy farm (ice cream)
65. go to Knights (more ice cream)
66. try Jeni's ice cream
67. Have a special day with J&J where we buy backpacks, lunch boxes and school supplies
68. grow tomatoes
69. grow basil, parsley, cilantro...
70. spend a day at Easton Town Center...ride the trolley, go out to lunch or dinner, maybe let the kids play in the foundtain
    
71. go on 6 dates with my hubby
72. spend an evening with Rebekah--dinner & a movie
73. go somewhere I've never gone before
74. not work--at least not most of the time. I think the baby I watch is still going to come one morning a week. We'll be poor, but it will be nice to have a break. :)
75. spend time in our backyard swing--relaxing
76. say yes to the ice cream man--at least a few times
    

Hope you're able to enjoy a wonderful summer too, however you celebrate it.

Edited: When I accomplish them, I'll highlight them in green.

Graduation

Well, our weekend started with baccalaureate. Jacob had had his allergy testing earlier that day, and honestly he was not up to being up late that night. Fortunately, Jason offered to stay home with Jacob and Julianna which was wonderful! I don't have any pictures from baccalaureate, but it was very, very nice.

Saturday, we spent the day getting ready for the party. At 6:00 we could get into the site where the party was, and we started doing some simple decorating.

I love the way their cake turned out.
As neat as it looks, it tasted ten times better. Yum!

Even though I'm awful at pictures and organizing,
Rebekah managed to pull together a wonderful picture display.

Rebekah and Jason's first band director came to the party.

This is her private lesson teacher. He was a year ahead of Jason.
We've been so truly blessed that he taught Rebekah.
She'll definitely miss him.

I love this shot. Unfortunately, Lori was sick, so she and Lily stayed behind.

Some of Rebekah's favorite teacher's came...

and friends, of course.

Sunday brought graduation.

It was wonderful.
Rebekah earned the 4.0 stole, the honors diploma, NHS cord, the thespian cord and a band distinction on her diploma. Very, very proud.

Her speakers were Claire and Susannah Shipman!!!
They were wonderful and I'm a huge fan of Claire's.
They graduated from our high school.

Rebekah's private lesson's teacher gave her her diploma...
and a big hug. :)

It was a wonderful weekend, and much to my relief it was not the emotional gauntlet I was fearing. Yes, I cried, but it was appropriate proud, bittersweet mommy tears and not out of control sobbing. I guess when Jason graduated and I was pregnant the hormones really wreaked havoc with my emotions.

I'm so proud of my girl and I can't wait to see what's next for her.

What's Going On...

So, there's been lots and lots going on, I figure the best thing to do is just a quick bulleted update. Hopefully you don't mind, it seems to be all I can handle right now.

• Julianna--Julianna has a dance friend, do you have dance friends? What that means is there's a little girl that is in both the dance classes that she's in, so that's how they "know" each other. This little girl has played at our house once, and Julianna had played at her house once, when her father died unexpectedly a week ago. I found this out when her mom called me and asked me if I could take her daughter to and from dance for the rest of the year. Obviously that was no problem, I drive right by her house, and it's an easy thing to do. My heart is just breaking for her family though. I can't even imagine every thing they're going through, everything they've yet to go through. We've had the little girl over for a playdate this week, I'll try to keep doing that every week or so for a while. It's a small thing, but I figure it's nice for the mom to have the break. I've been so, so proud of how Julianna's handling this. It's hard for her. It's scary. Also, she doesn't know this little girl real well. She's really risen to the occasion and is showing a lot of compassion and care. It's a really painful lesson, but I know for the rest of her life she'll remember that when someone you know loses someone they love, it's nice to step up and help however you can.
• Jacob--we had Jacob allergy tested. Surprise! He's allergic to everything. Well, not really, but he might as well be. He's allergic to cats, dogs, dust mites, trees, grasses, ragweed...I can't even remember them all. Fortunately, the doctor doesn't advise patients to get rid of their pets, he recommends keeping them out of Jacob's room. Unfortunately, he does advise getting rid of Jacob's stuffed animals. For a lot of kids that would be all right, but there's just no way for Jacob. He is a stuffed animal fanatic. There are nights he'll sleep with 30 of them. This weekend we're going to tear his room apart and clean everything top to bottom, including washing as many stuffed animals as we can. The rest? Not sure. I think I'll try putting them all in a plastic trash bag and leave them for a few weeks. Hopefully that will take care of the mites for a while. It's pretty overwhelming, honestly. He has a down comforter, I'll have to replace that with synthetic. He needs new pillows, a new mattress protector, an air purifier. The medicines he's been recommended to take cost $200.00 a month, but fortunately the doctor was receptive to trying some lower cost options instead. At this point, we can't tell if he has developed asthma or not, his allergies are too out of control to tell for sure, I'm very much hoping not. They're treating him as though he does, and we'll see.
• Jason--they put in an application for an apartment five minutes from our house today. I'm so excited! (That's an understatement.) He has a job interview Friday (prayers would be awesome), and hopefully he'll be able to find a job and their house will sell and things will start to fall into place for them.
• Rebekah--graduation was Sunday. It was wonderful. Truly. Worthy of it's own post, which I will try to get to soon. Warning: it will be a little obnoxious and pride-filled. Read at your own risk, lol.

That's what's going on here. Two more days of school. Yippee!

What I Want to Say,..

1. Don't ever say to me again, "someday I'll tell you everything and then you'll know, you're feelings will change, you'll understand, etc., etc., etc." I am well aware that there are issues, problems, secrets in my family. I get that. In some ways, I grew up with a lot of dysfunction. I get that too. I know there are things I don't know. Here's the thing, being filled in does not interest me. I have done my best with the knowledge I had at the time. The relationships I have I've worked hard for and honestly, I treasure. I know sometimes you get consumed with jealousy? hate? whatever, and want to spill your guts and change things. The thing is what you cannot tell me is context, and without context, what does any of it really mean anyway? I can't step back in time and see all sides and judge for myself what was going on, so I have no interest in the truth from your point of view. Please don't ever tell me (threaten me?) with "someday" again. Sadly, this one applies to more than one person in my family.
2. We are not close. I don't know why. It's not an age difference, it's a lot more than that. Basically we are two very, very different people. We have different priorities, we have different values, we are too different. Sometimes, siblings overcome their differences because they have the strong foundation of their upbringing to bring them together. We do not. Due to circumstances beyond all of our controls, our past is not something we can build on. Actually, our past is something we would have to overcome and our differences simply preclude that from ever happening. I do not understand the choices you make in your life. I cannot relate to your life. I do not truly know you and I am coming to grips with understanding that for a whole variety of reasons, it feels more comfortable to leave things that way. I'm sorry if that hurts you. Truly. I do not want to cause you pain, but I am starting to understand that there is still a very little girl inside me that is desperate to be "safe", and that feeling dominates the choices that I make and have made in my life. I'm learning that I do not want to change that. There are consequences to that, of course, but that's where I'm at right now. For now, it feels safer to me to keep you at the edge of my life. It's huge for me to admit that. Again, I'm sorry if that causes you pain. I've worked very, very hard to have the life that I have, and I don't handle chaos and drama well. I'm going to be true to myself and admit that, and give myself permission to be that way. I don't say any of this with pride. Believe it or not, I realize it's a pretty severe short-coming in my character. I wish it were different, but I'm honest enough to acknowledge that I obviously don't wish it was different enough to make it different. Sad, but true.
3. You can love someone even while acknowledging their flaws. I do not think your perceptions about people are wrong, I'm just operating under a different set of assumptions and expectations. I know I am and will be a flawed parent. I'm willing to accept that my parents did their best with what they had, that they made mistakes, but never with bad intentions. I forgive them their flaws and I pray that my children will forgive me mine. Why can I not give you that same benefit of the doubt? I don't know. I tell myself I do, but the distance between us speaks to a different truth. As I struggle with this, the only answer that seems clear to me comes again to a lack of a foundation of closeness combined with a fear of chaos. I'm sorry about that, but again, the fear is bigger than the desire to change things.
4. I guess I resent you, in some ways. I resent that when I see your name in my email box, or your number in my caller ID, my heart lurches. I have to steel myself to open the email, answer the phone. I've come to expect chaos from you, and as I've said, that scares me. No, scares is really not strong enough, it paralyzes me. Do you know how many family vacations you're ruined? I remember walking to the only pay phone at the campground during one precious family vacation, spending way too much time on the phone, trying to console you, worrying, worrying, worrying about what was coming, how it would impact everyone...endlessly worrying, endless chaos. I remember sitting in a hotel in Gatlinburg, on the phone for hours, literally hours, missing my family, missing interacting with my family, impacting what they could do for fear of disturbing an obviously difficult phone call. One call or email from you can send me into a tailspin for days, sometimes weeks, as I deal with old hurts, old fears, old feelings over and over again. The problem is, there are no answers to those feelings, fears, hurts, problems, so they just torture me until I'm able to put them back in their box and move ahead with my life again. I don't want to keep doing that. I don't want to live my life that way. I want peace and order and calmness. I want the life I've worked so hard to build.
   

I don't know how to end this. My stomach is in knots just typing this and reliving all the emotions you bring yet again. I crave the happy ending that brings us one big happy family where we're all good for each other and there for each other and my kids can have the Normal Rockwell family they so desire and deserve. My heart wants that, but my wiser (?) head knows that's not in our future and the best I can do is the best I can do, and for me, at least at this point in my life, that means concentrating on my family, my children, their present, their futures. I'm truly sorry.

Project 365 #21 & #22!

Well, things have been insane here at Chez Rittenberg. Rebekah had a lead in her school play, Mark & Jacob had a cub scout campout, Jacob came home sick from the campout, Rebekah had her last band concert; end of the year this, end of the year that, end of school this, end of school that; yada, yada, yada.

There hasn't been a lot of blogging going on, hence the two week's worth of 365 posts. I'll be back blogging one of these days, a lot going on the next three days though, baccalaureate, Rebekah's grad party, graduation, Jason & Lori here, Jacob's visit with the asthma specialist...I'll fill in blanks eventually.

May 21, 2010
Rebekah played Dottie in Noises Off.
It's hard work being in a play.
She came home very, very tired. :)

May 22, 2010
Jacob and Mark went on a Cub Scout Campout.
Unfortunately they were back home that night.
Jacob got very, very sick.

May 23, 2010
The last band concert.
The seniors sang the Alma Mater.
I love this shot of Rebekah with her friends.

May 24, 2010
Small snack before bedtime.
How long will it be before they stop using this table for everything?
A long, long time, I hope.

May 25, 2010
Dancing to The Monster Mash

May 26, 2010
That's HOT! for that late at night...inside.
Still didn't crack and put the AC on.

May 27, 2010
Still hot. Still no AC.

May 28, 2010
Don't take my picture!!!

May 29,2010
Sleeping Beauty :)

May 30, 2010
Squirt guns are very important around here these days.

May 31, 2010
More squirt guns...terrible picture but you get the idea. :)

June 1, 2010
Making school lunches.
What? Your kids don't ask for blue cheese? ;)

June 2, 2010
Julianna crossed over from Daisies to Brownies...

...and Jacob became a Webelos.

June 3, 2010
Don't judge me. It was late.

Hosted by Chris